previously on Dumbgeons and Dragons.
There are two locations and events that need to occur, at similar but slightly different points in time.
Time? Time.
You said time?
10 out of 10 would never want to fuck with time again.
One star Yelp review on that one.
Would not like.
To sum up, the first option is to go back to Celestia, to warn me.
The second is to go on an infiltrate or seek and destroy mission.
The ground begins to crack down the center of this street that leads up to the temple.
And it's splitting wide open directly between Bort and Flint, tearing up towards the temple.
And as it reaches it, it blows the two of you apart and to the ground, and the temple crumbles.
Welcome to Dumbgeons and Dragons. I'm your Dungeon Master Russ More. He, him also with me.
Today is Karla Maxted.
She, her playing Elia Strong, Yen Bol Nury, Nurikshus Akra, also known as Glim, all them. She, her.
And Tom Laird.
Yeah, that's me. He, him. I'm playing Moot. I'm playing Telgear. I'm playing Flint. And all three of them also he, hims.
And Amy More.
I'm also here. She, her.
And I will be playing Sullivan Sleight. He, him.
Thea Amastasia. She, her. And the more I think about her, them. Nighthunter, she, them.
Yeah, that's that. No, I feel like that really tracks.
I really, yeah. I've been thinking on it. Yeah.
For those who, I mean, we kind of briefly explained it in the first time that Elia, Nighthunter, and Opal showed up.
But they are part of our exclusive patron game that I shoehorned into this game without talking to Tom first.
That's right. There was no notice given.
Yeah. No notice given. Just, hey, here's these characters. Yes, I've sunk them deep into the darkest timeline.
Yes, they're living their best life on an island in the sun. It's fine.
The nice thing about us doing that is the timeline in this game is now so far advanced from the timeline in the Adventures of game, the patron game.
A patron game that really, it could be whatever you want it to be at this point. Who knows how they get there? We might never find out.
I mean, are we fucking level 20s? We have, we have buffed up our babies.
We have yet to have buffed up the side scroller. That's right.
Side scrollers are. Oh my God. Well, yeah. My barbarian. Yeah, no.
My Goliath barbarian buffed up level 20. My barbarian. Yeah. Yeah, they would be. I just got very excited.
They would be level 20s probably by this point. So the only ones that aren't level 20s are the oldest characters. Love it.
Thea never wanted to live to level 20 anyway. That's right. Better not burn out than fade away.
That's right. Don't want to live on to be a god. Gross.
I got a long way to go. So if you want to like go see those little, those fun characters and learn more about them, see why Russ is the way he is when he's playing Opal.
So yeah, no, yeah, you're going to have to go back because there's a history. Nothing is going to be explained and it's all going to be Russ's fault.
Opal started with a very different thing in mind, which we've talked about many times, but it's an evolution or devolution.
He's a wheeler and dealer through and through now. It's a great time.
If you become a patron, you can listen to all those episodes and find out what up with these.
And if you do want to actually see them, head over to our website, click on the support us tab and take a link right over to our store.
And you'll actually see the artwork there and you can get it on a t-shirt if you want.
You can see that key tar. It's pretty. And it does give him a mullet.
The more he plays it, the longer the mullet gets.
And you can see how cute a couple Nighthunter and Elia are. Yep.
The size difference is adorable. I assume I carry you around a lot. I would think so. I think you must. Yeah, absolutely.
So all of that and more Patreon.com slash dumb dragon cast where when you are a patron, you also get an episode dedicated to you like today's patron.
Emma L. Thanks, Emma. Thank you. Thank you so much.
And now, once you've visited Patreon.com slash dumb dragon cast, fucking let's play. Play, play, play.
Oh, we're getting back up.
The sound of waves crash up on the beach and Thea, Yenbul and Tulgear are walking along the forest line.
Contemplating with Ritz crackers and a box of wine in their hand.
Contemplating the meeting that they just had and the information imparted upon them.
Well, I'm glad we took Grants us back to the infirmary before going on this beach walk.
Well, the alternative of strapping him to my back didn't sound overly great.
This was not. Yeah, if he's going to be instrumental in any way, it's probably best we don't like accidentally drown him or anything like that.
Well, I mean, there might be a little asterisk next to that accidentally if you're involved.
We joke, but I would never. So that was a lot. Yeah. Yeah.
I'm not ashamed to say I don't fully understand what's going on here.
But I think one thing is really clear to me, and that's where I need to be in all of this.
And that is I'm the only one who really knows Lipsinki or Vorunax.
Or is that going to be a complete hindrance because of our past?
I don't know. I feel like that's where I have to be. Now I'm second guessing it. Should I not go?
I mean, if that's what you feel, I always think first thought, best thought.
I love that you live your life that way, Telgir, and maybe it'll serve me this time.
But I think I had perhaps a bit of a hand in Lipsinki being the way she is, not being able to save her,
kind of being the reason she ended up down there anyway.
So maybe this will be the way I can make it right.
But I mean, it still did sound like you saved her from one horrible fate.
It was just a cruel twist that she ended up in a different one.
Yeah, not even different, though, but worse, like eternities of torture, likely.
Yes, but not expected. You thought you were doing the right thing.
Yeah, I kind of feel like that could be printed on a t-shirt for me.
Yeah, she thought she was doing the right thing.
And then what about after? There's the things that we need to do now,
and then the things we need to do in the past.
So before?
Yes.
Well, and what if we can't sway either one of them?
Well, then I think that's when the fighting happens.
I'm under the impression that we go to the Abyss, find Lipsinki and Vorunax, try to convince them.
If that goes well, awesome, and then we all go to fight Orcus,
or it doesn't go well, that's shitty, fight them, fight Orcus?
But I think it's all happening at the same location.
I don't know if that's true.
Guys, I wasn't lying at all. I don't know how this is working.
I think Yenbul is going to walk you through it.
Okay, take me on a journey.
Bahamut said we should talk to Lipsinki and Vorunax now.
Yeah, in the here and now.
They are strong, they know the most.
If they come with us, we bring them back to when we go to the past to fight Orcus before.
Right. Oh, yes, yes, that does make, sorry, this boxed wine, right?
It's very strong.
It is.
I mean, it was the only option that Kat brought back with them, so.
I mean, in terms of like travel beverages, it's got this little tube with it you can suck out of it.
I'm picturing a Capri Sun.
I was picturing a juice box.
I mean, six in one, half in the other.
And tell me if I'm wrong, which you do, and also kind of like loudly in the meeting as well, which was not cool.
I thought I was very quiet.
I mean, I can make out half the words she said, so I don't think anyone else heard.
We're at your bad ear side, though.
Well, I mean, yeah, but that's kind of both sides.
If someone were to go and like, I guess, I guess that that group does both of the things, right?
They convince or not.
And then they also go back in time to fight Orcus.
Either with or without the help of.
Well, I mean, I don't know if that group does both of the things, because if that group convinces one or both of the the right hand, left hand to come with,
they might go tell Bahamut everything they know and warn him about what's happening, how to stop it,
because they'll have that inside baseball knowledge and maybe the other team is fighting Orcus.
I don't know. I don't know.
Yeah, I'm kind of confused as to when this is all is it all at once?
Are we waiting as a step by step?
I'm not sure. My head's not totally in the game either.
I have to admit what Bahamut said.
Yes, because, of course, and Flint and it's I think that different phases.
Yeah, I mean, step by step, going to get to your girl, et cetera, et cetera.
Oh, baby.
Step one, going to have lots of fun.
Step two.
Put your dick in the box.
There's so much we can do.
No, no, different songs.
Oh, different songs.
Step three. It's just you and me.
I think so.
Yeah.
Well, what do you two think?
I feel like we're planning a trip.
And where do you guys want to go?
I wish my trip was back.
I will help with whatever I have to help with.
But I wish that I was just going back to Gallimport before.
Well, maybe you can.
Yeah, there might be something to that.
He didn't seem to say no to that idea.
No, I think that was like a hard maybe.
So maybe if one or two or three of the other people want to come with Thea and do that mission, whatever it is, maybe you can head back to Gallimport and try and save the day.
Well, at least I think we have decided, Thea, that you at least for sure will talk to Lipsinki and Vorunax and we will come, Talgir?
I'm happy to help.
Sounds good.
Okay, pass me some more wine.
Oh, yeah, I put one in every pocket I have here.
We fade into Elia Nighthunter's cottage, and the two of them are seated at their small kitchen table.
I mean, small, like, enough for...
Relatively, too.
Seated at their cozy kitchen table.
I feel like I need to apologize.
Why? I don't...
Well, you...
You don't need to apologize for Opal. I hope you know that.
I think we have released our responsibility of him, his grown cat.
What I mean is you immediately thought to stay, and I immediately wanted to go and fight.
Oh, I see.
And I should have talked to you about that first, because communication is important and...
Well, I should have talked to you first, too. All I... I guess I was selfish.
I just thought, well, this is our home and we need to protect it.
And if everything that's going on in the rest of the world could possibly come here, I just would want to fight.
But you also want to fight and go and be a warrior like you are.
So I understand why your first instinct would be to volunteer, to go off, to hunt the worst creatures in the world.
But you make a good point. There could be fighting here, too. I do not know what to do.
Well, we could make sort of contingency plans.
What is contingency?
Well, if one thing happens, we do this. And then if something else happens, then we do this.
So if there doesn't seem to be any danger here, then we go fight.
But...
But if danger is here, we stay and fight.
Well, that makes me very happy. Either way, I get to fight and be with you.
Yeah, we'll just have to... When the time comes, I think we'll know what decision we need to make. I hope.
Oh, Bahamut give me strength.
It's okay. It's open.
Okay, come in.
Just wanted to check in. I noticed we were having a team meeting and wasn't invited.
Just thought I'd come and I brought some boxes of wine.
Oh, thank you.
Yep. And a few of the crackers that didn't get scooped up.
Thought maybe a little peace offering. I got a little excited.
I got... I know... I know... I know I'm a bit much.
What?
Well, I mean, two musical numbers was quite a large number of musical numbers for a town council meeting.
You didn't stick around for the encores that they called. There were six songs.
That is excessive.
More in the encore than in the performance.
Well, it felt like I didn't give them their full money's worth.
Nobody paid to be there.
Well, yeah, in the end times. What is money though, right?
When I named you song, Katie, this was not my hopes for you.
It was guiding in my life.
That is on me.
I'm sure you've discussed where you want to be if you want to be part of these teams that are going back.
I just want you to know that as estranged as we have been for several years since we've arrived here
and I kind of let it go to my head that the city was named Bright Cliffs because it was my family's city
and they're not around presently.
And I just took it upon myself as I do.
And you graciously stepped in and actually made the city work.
What I'm trying to say is I know you're my family.
And I'm sorry for being difficult.
Oh, well, that is very self aware of you.
I wasn't always this way.
I don't think.
I mean, I did go to school.
I mean, I have mentioned that I went to school for a long time and, you know, was raised by family.
They were absentee parents for part of it.
That's something to talk about.
Oh, yes, we noticed your attachment issues immediately after meeting you.
OK, well, I wear some things on my sleeve, just a few.
Not many to mention, obviously.
You want to come with us.
Well, what I'm trying to say is wherever you go, I want to go with you and be helpful.
Maybe bring some levity to the situation.
But also, I need to be with you.
Oh, well, you're our family, too.
Of course, I don't want to speak for you, Nighthunter, but I assume.
I will never say it out loud myself, but you've already said it's fine.
It's fine.
Where we go, you go, too.
Thank you.
I don't know if it's too forward, but maybe a group hug?
We haven't had one of those in a while.
One arm only.
Well, I've got two arms.
You each have one arm.
So that works out, and he's there.
And we fade out on a soft song that he sings out.
And I will always love you.
That is a throuple nobody asked for.
That's right.
We see Yenbul sitting on the beach, finishing her box of wine, as footsteps are heard coming up behind her.
She turns and looks and sees Baham quietly approaching.
I wish I had some more wine to offer you, but I drank all of it.
It's all right.
You seem troubled.
Val, I want to help.
I want to save the world and take down the bad guys and all of all of that.
But I wish I was working to save Callamport.
I wish I could.
I know if V saves the world, it is the whole world.
But I feel so removed from everything and my whole home destroyed.
And it's hard.
We don't know if there's a way back.
We don't know if it's a return trip.
Or if this is where everyone's story ends.
Don't want to send anyone back to any specific location to do any task.
And have them regret that decision if it's the last thing that they can do.
If you think that your heart and abilities are better put to, depending on the time and outcome of all of the other avenues,
better spent in Callamport, even as a test to find out if we can bring you back.
So are you saying I could go to Callamport in the past and then perhaps come back here and report back?
If possible, yeah.
Or I could go back to Callamport in the past and stay in Callamport in the past and try to...
...warn them.
...prevent.
...ready them.
...prevent the end of the world in my home.
Callamport is a turning point for a lot of things that have happened.
It overruns the entire south.
Well, I don't want to abandon my new friends, but I would love to try to save my home and my family and warn them.
So you need a test.
If you need someone to try it, I would be happy to try it.
Bahamut nods and looks out at the ocean.
The two of you sit in silence.
A small...
You tell me with the prospect of possibly going home, maybe for good, maybe to go and return.
Tell me what kind of washes over as visible or even just emotion going through Yenbul.
I think that Yenbul would be torn, like excited on one hand and feeling kind of guilty for feeling excited.
But also just feeling guilty that she doesn't want to just peace out.
Like she's really been through some stuff with Thea and Talgir these past, you know, few weeks or months.
But, you know, she's thinking she could save her whole civilization, basically, maybe, and all of the people that she knew and loved for her entire life.
So that draw would be pretty strong.
So I think a little bit weirdly elated, but feeling guilty for feeling that way.
So a lot of emotions, the wine isn't helping.
The puzzled emoji comes over Yenbul's face.
Exactly.
And we find Mook, Glim, and Sully atop a mountain peak not too far from the beach.
How you guys got me to fucking walk up here is just beyond me.
I told you look at this view though.
Oh, it was totally worth it.
I mean, it's a good view.
I say I feel close to the Bahamut, but it means all the way down there.
Well, yeah, he sees down there.
A good hike always clears my head, though.
How are you guys feeling?
Well, I mean, Bahamut's here.
So awesome.
Except that the whole rest of the world is destroyed.
So bad.
Yeah.
No, that tracks.
Sully?
Yeah.
Guys, I don't know.
I kind of want to punch Orcus in the face, you know?
Totally.
But I also don't want to die.
So does that.
Yeah.
Also, I really, yes, punch Orcus right in his stupid Orcus face.
But also, if I could save Bahamut before he like all the bad stuff happened to him, that would be.
Oh, yeah.
I mean, he's like, you know, my main guy.
So if I could.
But is that am I being a chicken?
I guess that's my question.
I don't think so.
I think you're.
But the other one seems more dangerous.
Yeah.
No, it does.
But I don't know.
I think the wanting to save Bahamut before any of this befalls him, I mean, that seems true to your character.
I don't think you're being scared or brave more than one or the other.
But I just think that's that's what you would want to do.
I'm sort of more like defensive, like then then offensive, you know, like if I could just stop the bad thing from happening.
Hold on a second.
How I how I interpret it is when when someone goes back to one Bahamut, it doesn't mean that none of the bad stuff isn't going to happen.
Right.
Well, I guess it depends.
Like, say we go warn Bahamut and then everything else happens exactly the same as it happened.
Then I think we kind of just end up kind of how it is now.
Mm hmm.
But but but but but but but if we go back and warn Bahamut and then they go punch Orcus like to death.
Sure.
Yeah.
Then it doesn't.
So it's like it's it's it's a two armed attack.
OK.
Yes.
Two pronged is a better way of saying that.
But OK.
A war on two fronts.
Another flip side to that thing.
Yes.
Which one seems harder?
Oh, I'm just saying.
Yeah.
And then, like, I get it.
Destimators of dragons or something like that.
They like they were super cool when I was little.
However, they've you know, they seem a little out of practice.
Maybe they should be the ones doing the easy messenger job.
Instead of because if we're over here just being like, hey, Bahamut, watch out.
That means they're down there like punching Orcus in the face.
But if they don't do their job, then everything is still real shitty.
Right.
Regardless of if we do our job, because an Orcus is still there and stuff.
Yeah.
That's a really.
I mean, not that I want to, because I said I don't want to die.
I'm just saying, do we want to leave the Orcus in the hands of the like super cool,
you know, like, you know, like 11 years ago crew?
Don't tell.
I don't ever tell them.
This is between us.
No, mad, mad respect.
Obviously, Tiamat and all that.
But I know I hear what you're saying.
You don't want to leave it up to someone else.
You want to make sure you can go and finish the job yourself.
So you know it's done.
And I mean, I think we're a little more skilled in battle.
Did you see the faces when that when that dragon's head came off, Glim?
Oh, when Glim just like descending from the sky.
I mean, I mean, so it's just something to think about.
I'm not saying we shouldn't go see Bahamut, but I'm not saying we should not go see Bahamut.
You know, so what do you think?
I feel like maybe because there was like someone has to go to the abyss and like shit.
That's so bad that maybe we like glossed over kind of the challenging part of the messenger job.
Like it must be there.
There must be some like challenge and danger.
Otherwise, yeah.
And then the other thing to think about is what about Thea's friend that like works for Orcus?
Oh, yeah.
Like if they're going to I mean, we probably can't.
They like have a relationship or whatever.
So they could like maybe convince them to like turn on him.
And I don't know how we do that part of it, although you are pretty convincing.
Well, I was going to say.
Yeah.
But I mean, that.
Yeah.
You know, then OK, so they go and they talk to, you know, the right and the left hand and we go warn Orcus.
No, no, Bahamut about Orcus.
That's right.
I'm not turning coat in here.
I'm just getting confused.
Sparks.
Why?
I mean, it's been.
You should have had more snacks.
I wish I should have eaten more crackers with the wine.
It goes to Orcus.
Yeah.
That the Goliath.
Why?
I mean, what?
She seems pretty bad ass.
Yeah, I.
And there was another Goliath out there.
Yeah, that's true.
That's that's twice as many Goliaths as we've ever had.
Goliaths should go.
So I don't know if we're all going to just be reconvening and given ideas.
We go and one Bahamut and then the and her crew go and convince the bad people to be good people.
And then the Goliath and whoever's left over go punch Orcus in the face.
Yeah.
I mean, it's turned into more of a three pronged attack.
Well, then I suppose if if they're if they're success, success, if they do it, then they can come back with the people and then go punch Orcus in the face.
Right.
Yeah.
I guess maybe you're right.
I maybe and I know I know you'll believe this, but I maybe like got a bit of my Bahamut blindness on.
So, you know, I get pretty focused.
I don't know.
So maybe I don't know.
I mean, I guess it isn't just up to us.
Right.
Like the other everyone's kind of I mean, we can see everyone here from top of this mountain.
They're all kind of having their own little chit chats about what they want to do.
So do we all need to agree as a group?
Who goes where?
I guess.
I mean, probably not that you can't force anyone to go to the abyss.
Right.
Yeah.
So it sounds like maybe we're like good either way or you really want to go fight Orcus.
Well, I mean, I don't really want to do any of this.
I know this island and the wine.
It's pretty nice.
Right.
Yeah.
Why do you have more crackers though?
Here you go.
Oh, thank you.
I see you driving down town with the girl I love and I'm like it's the middle.
Dude, you missed it.
I did not.
I did it.
It was great.
It was perfect.
It was beautiful.
Why didn't you say interlude?
Oh, you did.
We don't say interlude.
No, no.
But you could.
But but it's the middle.
I see you driving around town.
I know.
But you could interlude.
Oh, so what song is that?
What?
Fuck you.
Tom.
Oh, sorry, Tom.
OK.
I'm familiar with the song.
I just never once.
Heard it sung like that.
I've never once heard it sung so beautifully.
Well, it's so good.
Right.
Back off.
He's mine.
Hey, everybody.
Welcome to the middle.
It's getting hot and heavy in here.
We're spicing things up in the kitchen.
Tom and I can go if.
Yep.
No problem.
End call.
Click.
No, that's too much pressure because then I feel like we'd have to do something
when really all I'd want to go do is watch TV.
What are you guys watching right now?
Nothing that's that good, I thought.
400% derailment.
OK.
You know what, though?
Because I don't like people thinking about us doing it.
That's fair.
I'm going to say it.
We're right here in the middle.
We're surrounded by friends.
Don't think about me and Russ doing it.
Think what you want.
We're in the middle.
CeeLo Green's here.
It's great.
What we want to talk to you about is our other show, our baby show,
The Facing Fate.
That's won more awards than Dumbgeons & Dragons,
and we'd love for you to go check it out and give it a little boost.
See if there's something that you really like over there,
because we have so many different stories.
It's an anthological series.
There's some sci-fi horror.
There's some Cthulhu horror.
There's some...
I'm sensing a theme here.
There's some dark urban horror.
There's some dark comedy urban horror.
So there's some thriller horror aspect to it,
but each within its own genre set,
and it's all improvised and so beautiful.
It is incredibly, incredibly well produced for us.
I mean, that's why it's won awards.
It sounds incredible, and it's super interesting.
So like season one, we're on the moon, not us,
but like the characters we're playing,
and scary stuff happens.
We would be on the moon if they let us on the moon to record that.
And then season two, we're in like 1980s Toronto?
Toronto?
Yeah, so we go hard on the...
90s? 80s?
90s, yeah.
Hard on the Canadiana.
You know we love to do it.
And then yeah, there's a season of Cthulhu that's up there,
and then another mini season of Cthulhu
that will be coming in the near future.
And then there's our Black Knight series as well.
So we got all sorts up there.
And Black Knight is...
I don't want to describe it because it gives things away,
and I don't want to give anything away,
but it is very funny, but...
It's satirical reality television at its finest.
Yes.
Alright, yep.
And more.
Say something without saying anything.
Exactly.
You did it.
But we're really proud of the shows, and we would love it
if you would go listen.
Like Crest said, they kind of go by season,
so if you're not interested in the moon, that's cool.
Sure, skip that season.
Just listen to a different season.
They're totally different each season.
Or download them all and then just delete them
without listening to them.
That's fine too.
That's also fine.
You know what?
You live your life the way you want to.
We don't want to tell you what to do.
If you got time, give them a listen.
If you got time and room on your phone,
just download them all.
It's fine.
That's right.
But now that all of the awkwardness is over
and we've talked about Facing Fate,
we'll get you back to this episode.
Thank you for listening, everybody.
You have a great week.
Bye.
In the med tent,
Thea is sitting beside Flint.
And we're going to wake you up
and we're going to go and kick Orcus' ass.
And so Lipsinki is like all evil now and stuff.
And so we're going to try to convince her
that she should come and join us.
But I'm going to kind of really need you for that.
So if you're listening,
Bahamut's supposed to have a plan maybe.
I don't know.
I'm not sure.
But please wake up.
You hear the tent flap open.
You turn and look and you see Bahamut
come in and sit on a stool.
To be polite,
quietly as you
finish talking with Flint.
Hey.
Hi.
So how do we wake this big guy up?
Well, it's not so simple as just shaking him awake.
I probably shouldn't have been slapping him
this whole time then, hey.
Yeah.
Donnie told me that that's what he was just positioned to do.
And I told him that's probably not going to help.
I was joking.
That dragon has no idea about sarcasm.
No.
For how sarcastic he is.
Yeah.
Double-edged sword there.
Flint and Bort are very intertwined.
There are rituals in order to bring them apart.
However, most of them that we are equipped to do here
could leave one of them or both of them
in a state that is not helpful.
Like a vegetative state?
Kansas?
Like worse than what he's at right now?
Yeah.
Okay.
Well.
One option is to try to remove one of the souls.
What would happen to that soul?
We would have to find a place to put it.
We can contain it until a point of which
the soul could be released.
We could just release the soul.
And then what happens to the soul?
Well.
Okay.
So option A is to remove a soul.
I'm guessing Bort, do you get to choose?
There is a risk that it could be Flint.
It could be Bort.
Okay.
There is a risk trying to save both and capture one
that we could lose both.
But can you guarantee which one you save?
Not with a precise science.
So if we go to just save one and forsake the other,
it could not even end up being Flint to the end.
It might not.
Okay.
They will be given a choice and will likely have to decide
amongst themselves who stays in Flint's body.
Okay.
I don't know what that decision looks like.
So just so I have it all straight, my options are
try to remove one and keep it, store it, house it,
Tupperware, I don't know, until it can be put
into a body of some kind or set it free,
unentwine the souls with the intent on just saving
one of them, setting the other one free regardless.
But either way it happens, it's Flint and Bort
who have to make the choice who is staying in Flint's body.
Yeah.
Okay.
The question is, do you want to try?
Well, my final option is doing nothing
and Flint just wastes away on this bed
battling Bort inside his mind.
Until one of them is victorious in their own way.
Okay.
As you can see, Bort is in the lead.
Does it make me a bad person that I'm really mad at Flint?
No.
Well, you said that Flint is,
he plays an important role, right?
He does.
Or the soul in Flint's body does, anyways.
Well, then I think we have to try.
It's not just about Flint.
And if he could be the difference between
getting us out of this hellhole and fixing something
and not completely losing all the realms,
then I, well, we have to do it.
Not a question.
It's what Flint would do.
I'll have Leosan prepare the ritual then.
Oh, he'll love that.
It's a lot of steps, isn't it?
It's quite a few.
A lot of gathering of materials.
He's going to be in his heyday.
Do I get to watch?
The form he's going to have to fill out,
especially if it goes wrong, right?
Like, oh, the paperwork after.
Fuck up a ritual.
Good thing Flint re-upped with that lifetime insurance policy.
Yeah.
It's a good thing Thea signed herself as beneficiary.
Back in the town council chamber,
everyone has gathered to share their findings
and figure out who is going to the abyss
and who is going to Celestia.
Bahamut steps forward.
Before we decide, are there any questions?
Oh, for sure.
For sure.
Yes, Glim.
Question.
It seems like...
Open forum.
Feel free to speak.
Of the two tasks,
the going back in the past tasks,
let's not deal with the current tasks,
the going back in the past tasks,
one, it seems very scary and hard,
so we should send some really strong and mighty warriors,
and then the other is like,
just like going to see you and Celestia,
which sounds dope.
Like, don't get me wrong, that sounds so good,
but it seems like one of those seems a lot harder
than the other.
I might have underplayed Celestia.
Soon after the team arrives,
Celestia is hit with an attack.
The attack to overthrow me, my dragons,
and all who could stop Orcus from there out.
So it's more of a letting you know
and also a defense mission.
As much as it can be.
Well, because I thought you said that the last team
didn't quite arrive with enough time for you
to do anything with the information,
are we going to that same point or are we?
Hopefully going sooner.
Again, not a precise science.
Right, right.
But if you arrive at the same time,
and if this second team,
which as far as I am under the impression
was a non-existent the last time,
is unsuccessful,
then there could be another attack.
And by that time Orcus's forces
are already more powerful than I can withstand.
If you're looking for a fight,
you might get one either way.
Well, I mean,
sounds dangerous
and important.
I mean, maybe,
maybe with my knowledge of Bahamut and Celestia,
like I might be better suited to go there
because I have,
I mean, I don't know your guys' background
with Bahamut.
I mean, probably you love him as much as I do,
obviously, because these are the best,
but maybe you wouldn't know so much about
where he's from and what it's like and,
I mean, does that make sense?
Should we, should we be the ones that go?
I think it makes sense for you guys to go.
I mean, if you're going to warn Bahamut,
who would he trust more than,
you know, you.
Like his number one fan.
Number one fan.
Right?
I need to go
and get Lipsinki or Vorunax or both.
And whoever wants to come with me is more than welcome.
It kind of sounds like
we're decided.
As long as
Brightcliffs is safe for now,
we will also join the fight.
Yes, if forces attack here,
we will defend here.
It's our home and we know it,
but if we are needed somewhere else and Brightcliffs is safe,
then, then we're happy to join
wherever you want
the three of us.
It's the first time they said the three of us in a long time.
He will be useful too sometimes.
I'll bring snacks.
So,
Thea and Tolgir
and Grancis and his knowledge of the Abyss
and hopefully inside forces from
directly within Orcus's regime
will go to the Abyss.
Yenbul?
I mean, I think you forgot a name there.
Velay.
I think I may have
a different mission.
Someone needs to test
the abilities of the stone.
So you're going as a crash test to me?
Well,
hopefully not.
I will do a test
and to try to get to Calumport.
How will we know if that even works?
Or is that just something that
the all powerful over here will know?
Well,
if I go and return,
you will know.
But if I just go,
Bahamut will...
How will you know?
There will be a sign
if it works either way.
I understand.
You want to save your city.
If you see us...
Don't say anything.
That'd be super awkward.
I don't know.
Make sure a big rock doesn't fall on me or something, okay?
Okay, I will make sure a big rock doesn't fall on you.
See ya. Big hugs. Big hug.
It has been an honor to work with you.
You too, Yanball.
And I'm not leaving this minute.
We will...
We will have time to say goodbye.
Just in a less public place.
It is fine.
We don't have to...
Okay, I'm gonna go.
And Moot, Clem, and Sully,
you will be going to Celestia.
Dang right.
Yeah.
Did you already know we were gonna go
because it was us before?
Or maybe you shouldn't tell us.
I think that's kind of an inappropriate question.
It's like asking...
I'm sorry.
Hey, hey, hey, hey, where can I go?
Can I come with you guys?
Well, I mean...
I feel like I need to be in one of these teams.
They got Grants over there.
He's supposedly all-powerful,
so I don't want to take the all-powerful stone from him.
You don't want to steal the thunder.
You just want to get closer to Bahamut, don't you?
I mean, if I can go back to when he was a younger man.
I don't know if he was ever a younger man.
Well, ten years does a lot to a god,
especially when he's in his home palace.
Maybe you can fuck him when he's a dragon.
Ten years.
Maybe I can fuck him when he's a dragon.
I like the way you think, Sully.
They call me Sully for a reason.
Let's go back in time and change the future.
There's a rumble that echoes throughout all of Brightcliff's
and the island of Maztica.
The moment of joy for whatever it is
is over as you run outside
and see undead dragons
crashing into whatever field is keeping this place alive.
Airships surrounding the area
and dark clouds pushing forward.
The sound of crashing waves is interrupted
only by the moans of zombies
who have walked up under the waves onto the beach.
The entire scene fades to a harsh static.
Where we see Flint and Bort
lying motionless on the streets of Mithril Hall.
Dumbgeons and Dragons, Season 2, Episode 109.
Starring Amy More as Thea Mastasia,
Sullivan Sleight, and Gael Nighthunter Ogallacanu,
Carla Maxted as Yen Bull Nury, Glim, and Elia Strong,
Tom Laird as Tulkier Heavyfoot,
Flint Firebeard, and Moot,
and Russ More as your Dungeon Master.
Editing, production, and sound design by Russ More.
This episode featured music from Epidemic Sound
and sound effects from Epidemic Sound,
Boom Library, and Sound Ideas.
A huge thank you to our supporting producers,
Gabriel Lynch, Jessica Babyok, Cat Waterflame,
Jacob Madden, Christian Brown, Devin Michaels,
Craig Zeiss, Aaron Stevens, Darylith,
Lulahan, and L.A. Branton.
To support Dumbgeons and Dragons,
and our many other productions,
and get access to an exclusive podcast
called The Adventures Of, bonus episodes,
and much more, please join our Patreon
at Patreon.com slash dumbdragoncast.
You can also follow us at facebook.com
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and on Instagram and Twitter,
at dumbdragoncast.
Thank you for listening.
Have a great week.
We'll talk again soon.
Let me set the scene.
We're ready.
Good.
Let me just do it.
Shut up, Tom.
I feel like Opal spent a lot of time
on Better Help.
Where do we go when we die?
Is that something you can tell me?
All dogs go to heaven, Thea.
I don't know what that means.
Sorry.
I'm watching Carl down there.
The question is,
do you want to...
That's gotta sound insensitive.
Build a snowman.
Your kids, Marty!
Grancis wakes up and yells something,
just like Christopher Lloyd.
Dumbgeons and Dragons is a Dumb Dragons production.